Friday, December 2, 2011

Leather Bear Tails: Co-Topping

Lately I have been changing and growing and really wanting to learn new things. So, for the first time ever I co- topped my slave with another person!! Then for the first time ever I had a double scene with my slave and another couple! The other couple is not Master and slave, they are Sadist and masochist that was quite an experience. It was quite fun coming to the realization that the goals are completely different for a Sadist then they are for a Master! WOW!! It was amazing and invigorating playing off their energy, challenging myself and learning new things the whole time.


In the ten years that my slave and I have been together I have never allowed another Dominant to touch her during play. When we were very first together and I wanted to expand my skill base, I went to another Master and asked to learn new things using my slave as the bottom. It did not take long for the other Master to start treating me like I was a submissive, and wanting to do things to my slave that were more about this other persons desire then my learning. After that it has taken years for me to relax and be open enough to include another person in play. Or trust another person to put their hands on my slave.


There are a few things that are supposed to be done before another person co-tops in a scene. It is like starting from square one, you all sit down, you all negotiate, you all talk about hard limits, toys to be used and not to be used, who is in control of the scene, who is doing what to whom, who can call the scene and so on.


So…


I broke every rule possible. Yep, total disregard for the rules of engagement.


The first time I called in the other person to co-top, I tied up my slave, put a blindfold on her, and laid her down on the bed. Then I thought “Hey I have an idea!” I walked out of the room leaving her alone, and asked the other person if they were interested in co-topping. I was so excited when I got an emphatic yes and we walked back to the room and began the scene.


It was phenomenal!!! I got very lucky that the other person watched me very closely and followed my lead. They went just far enough throughout the play then would stop, and I got to learn by watching their style!


The second time I did the same thing.


I was standing there before play had started and I got to thinking “Hey I have an idea.” I went over to the other person, a Sadist and asked if we could co-top out bottoms together. I was so nervous and intimidated to ask, I was really thinking that they would say no, and so when they accepted I was thrilled! This other person has such a great skill set, and I just wanted to learn and hope that I could keep up without embarrassing myself!


The basis of the scene were decided between the Sadist and me, and never discussed with the bottoms. Again complete disregard for the rules of engagement. But once it was started it was amazing! The Sadist concentrated on their bottom and I concentrated on my slave while they were tied together and the whole thing was a huge ball of awesomeness! I learned so much, and I got great ideas for more play! I was thrilled at the experience!


It was really something.


But, in retrospect I was very lucky.


I had two scenes and both of the tops respected me, my relationship and my boundaries, there was no play for dominance between the other tops and myself, there was no showboating and we followed each other’s leads. It was really something.


A lucky something, because it could have easily gone the other way.


Although as a group we did not negotiate, I have known these people for a while, I have seen them play and I have met with them personally and socially. I knew that the energy that they would bring would be amazing, sexual, and intense. But most of all, I knew that this want going to be about showing off or trying to one up each other at the bottoms expense. It was about a wonderful exchange of ideas and play that left me and my slave flying for days.



If you are interested in play parties, hands on workshops, or power munches in the Albuquerque area please contact the 20 year organization of AEL at:

aelmailing@gmail.com

If you are interested in an active online community please find:

Fetlife.com

Group name:

New Mexico Fetlifers

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